Blind to Sin Page 16

  HERRICK SAT next to his mother, arm around her. She leaned against him, her eyes fluttering and her breath soft and even. Herrick gave her a quick squeeze. Sarah was in the kitchen making tea. Kenneth had stepped out to call Donne. On the TV, two NBA teams went at it, running way more isolation plays than Herrick could tolerate.

  Tammy was quiet. Herrick wasn’t sure she’d said more than six words in over an hour. But that was okay. She was here.

  That was different.

  He expected to go into full PTSD mode when he first saw her—the shakes, the heavy breathing, the sweats. A true panic attack. But that didn’t happen. In fact, the usual adrenaline surge went away when he hugged her, some instinct from his childhood kicking in. He felt safe with her around.

  And he wanted to protect her.

  Kenneth stormed back into the apartment. He slammed the door so hard, Tammy shuddered in Herrick’s arms. Kenneth slapped the phone down on the table and started pacing the room. He was the one going through PTSD, that was for sure.

  “Cole is going to come for her,” Herrick said. “He’s going to track her down.”

  “No, no, no.” Kenneth kept pacing. “No, he’s not.”

  Herrick gave his mom another squeeze and then gently eased his arm from around her.

  Herrick walked away from the couch over to the window, forcing his dad to follow. Outside the window, a bird fluttered its wings as it searched for food on the ledge. There didn’t appear to be anything to eat waiting for him, but the bird walked back and forth anyway. Herrick tapped on the pane and it flew away.

  Kenneth stood next to him. They didn’t make eye contact.

  “He loved Mom and she ran from him. He’s crazy. He’s going to want her back. We are going to have to hide her.”

  “No. We do the job. As long as Cole has the money, he won’t care.”

  Herrick shook his head. “Why did he lie to her? That’s cruel, even for Cole.”

  “When Cole told me about the job, he told me about Tammy’s illness. And how it could save her. Get her to Cuba. This place, they’ve lost money before. Billions that was supposed to go to Iraq. But we need you.”

  Herrick shook his head. “Or Neil Haskins. Or Manuel.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You need a military guy, don’t you? I’m retired, and Haskins is in the National Guard. I don’t know what you’re going to use one of us for, but you need us.”

  “Haskins was never part of the plan. You were.”

  Down on the street, Herrick saw Donne crossing Washington and approaching the apartment.

  “Why?”

  Kenneth shook his head.

  “Dad, secrets time is up. Lay it all on the table. You want me to help you with a crime that could get us put away for life. Or worse, the death penalty.”

  “You don’t have to worry about that.”

  “How the hell do you know? Jesus. Spill it, Dad. The whole plan. What’s going on?”

  Kenneth tilted his chin toward the window. “Jackson’s here. I’m going to go talk to him on the street.”

  “Dad.”

  Kenneth walked to the door. “Take care of you mother. It will all become clear soon. Promise.”

  “Like hell,” Herrick said, but the door clicked shut before Kenneth responded.

  Sarah put the tea on the coffee table, and Herrick considered bourbon instead. She walked over and gave him a kiss on the cheek, and then looked at Tammy.

  “How are you feeling, Mrs. Cole?”

  Tammy sat up, leaned over and picked up the tea with two hands. She took a long sip. “Call me Tammy. Please. And I’m tired. I need to sleep.”

  “You can have the bed, Mom. Sarah, you don’t mind the couch tonight, do you?”

  Sarah smiled. “Where are you going to sleep?”

  “I probably won’t. Not tonight.”

  Tammy said, “You have to rest.”

  “No, Mom. I need to think.”

  Tammy pushed herself off the couch and headed toward the bedroom. “Elliot said he lied to me to get your dad involved. But that—I don’t know. It feels wrong. There’s more. But I can’t focus right now.”

  Herrick watched her go into the bedroom. And then he turned to Sarah.

  “You going to work tomorrow?”

  Sarah nodded. “Kids need me too.”

  “Can you get her out of here first? A hotel or something. Some place comfortable that has room service.”

  Sarah smiled. “I got your credit card number.”

  Herrick turned back toward the window.

  “Matt,” she said. “I’m worried about this. Be smart.”

  “I’m trying,” he said.

  “Come on. I’m not going to leave you alone. I’m staying.”

  Sarah left the room, and Herrick’s phone buzzed. He looked at the caller ID and saw it was a number he didn’t recognize. He answered anyway.

  It was Christenson.

  “Herrick. The media is going to go with this in an hour, but I wanted you to know first, since you’re involved.”

  Herrick sucked in air.

  Christenson continued, businesslike. “The day you were here, when the alarm went off, we lost a rocket launcher. And some other guns. MPs are going to come talk to you in the morning. But you were with me the entire time. We were looking for your buddy. Got me?”

  Herrick dropped the phone.

  DONNE SAW Kenneth leave the apartment building, looking directly at him. Donne broke into a sprint, and brakes screeched as he crossed the street. Kenneth didn’t flinch or run. He stood there grinning.

  Grabbing Kenneth by the shirt, Donne said, “I should kill you.”

  Kenneth spread his hands, leaning back so Donne was holding him up by his shirt.

  “Uh-huh. You keep saying you should have. You’re too weak. Prison broke you,” he said. “And let’s say you do. What happens then?”

  “We can go back to our lives.”

  Kenneth brushed Donne’s hand away. Donne flexed his hands into fists. But didn’t step forward. Kenneth brushed a winkle out of his shirt, something Donne had seen him do a thousand times back in prison.

  “What life is that, Jackson?”

  Donne didn’t say anything. A couple of onlookers stopped, and then, when Donne didn’t throw a punch, kept walking.

  “Come on, tell me,” Kenneth said. “What life?”

  Donne breathed in through his nose.

  “Yeah. That’s what I thought. I’m all you’ve got. Without me, where are you going to go? You can’t go back to New Brunswick. You’re not going to be able to get a real job or go back to Rutgers or do any of that stuff you told me about before Kate died.” Kenneth’s grin grew. “That’s right. Don’t you remember all that down time? All the shit you told me about your life? I know you, Jackson. I know you better than anyone knows you. I know you better than I know my own fucking son.”

  Donne cocked his fist back. More onlookers stopped. One took out a cell phone. Donne gritted his teeth so hard his jaw hurt. Kenneth didn’t move. Donne exhaled. He put his fist down. The cell phone guy booed. The crowd dissipated and they were alone.

  “You killed a friend of mine,” Donne said.

  Kenneth shook his head. “I didn’t. Elliot Cole didn’t. Could have been anyone.”

  Donne turned around and stared at the traffic. He should have saved the image on his phone, the burner. But the shock of the blood and the eyes without vision shook Donne and he deleted it immediately. Now, he realized, as the adrenaline peeled away from him, how stupid that was. Evidence gone. A signed text message with images of a dead body on it.

  You’re slipping, he told himself. But then wondered if actually he was. Maybe the ties to Kenneth were right. How many times did he have to save Donne’s life in jail?

  “Have you been playing me this entire time?” Donne asked.

  “I don’t understand what you mean.”

  “Since Matt gave me your name, you protected me. You kept me aliv
e in jail. You broke Luca Carmine’s neck in front of everyone. And still you got out. And you brought me with you. Since you got my name, have you been planning on bringing me with you?”

  Kenneth came up next to him. They both stood on the curb watching traffic stop and start. The one-way streets of Hoboken that intersected with Washington were clogged with cars waiting for green lights. Washington was packed with cars looking for parking. The Hoboken way.

  “I have known about Cole’s idea for a long time. But we didn’t have a plan until I met you. Until my son was involved. A stroke of luck, I guess.”

  Donne said, “Yeah. I have the best luck.”

  Kenneth said, “You have no life now, but imagine what you could do when we finish the job. What just a million would buy you. You could track down that woman—what was her name? Jeanne? You could find her. Make things right.”

  Donne felt the emptiness in his stomach. He didn’t want Jeanne back, though a part of him wanted to track her down again. He wanted Kate back, and that would never happen. Maybe he could return to Vermont.

  But a heist of this size was a death sentence, nothing less.

  “What about Tammy?”

  Kenneth didn’t respond.

  “Did you know? Did you know her results were faked?” Donne said the words, but didn’t want to hear the answer.

  Kenneth rubbed his hands together.

  For an instant, Donne’s stomach muscles relaxed. He though Kenneth wasn’t going to answer.

  “Know?” Kenneth put his hands back in his pockets. “It was my idea.”

  The air went out of Donne and his stomach turned. He coughed to cover up the physical reaction of flinching.

  “How do you think we would get her to agree to be an accomplice? While I don’t think she enjoyed seeing me go to prison, she loved her new life. She wasn’t my Bonnie anymore. She was a Real Housewife of New Jersey—once she wasn’t hiding anymore. We needed to find a reason for her to go back to the old ways. She was sick. We just extended her illness.”

  Donne burned inside. “You put her through that?”

  “She could have stayed with me.” Kenneth worked his jaw. “But she let me go to prison.”

  Donne turned toward Kenneth and pushed him. Pushed him again. Kenneth scuttled backward along the curb.

  One more push, Donne thought. One more and Kenneth would trip into the street. Someone looking for a parking spot wouldn’t see him and run him over. That was all it would take. And Donne could move on with life.

  Kenneth knew it too.

  “You won’t do it.”

  Donne paused.

  “You’re a chicken. You couldn’t even kill Manuel, and he was fodder for you.”

  “A test?”

  Kenneth nodded.

  “I chose to go to jail. It was me. I pled guilty. It was the only way to keep my friends safe. And then you expect me to kill someone? Death is what I’m running from.”

  “It’s the only way to fix a problem. Of course, killing me won’t stop anything. Everything is already in motion. I’m just a cog. Not the entire wheel. Alive or dead, this goes down morning after tomorrow.”

  Donne put his arms down and Kenneth straightened up.

  “Why did Manuel come after me?” Donne asked.

  Kenneth cracked his neck. “Elliot thinks you’re too much of a wild card. He didn’t trust you. I did. But I wanted to see what you were made of.”

  “Maybe you and Cole should stop playing games.”

  Kenneth shook his head. “But that’s the fun! Elliot loves the spotlight, the planning. And he thinks he’s better than me.”

  “I’m leaving,” Donne said.

  “If you go, you’re a dead man.” Kenneth pulled open his jacket to reveal a pistol. Donne also caught glimpse of a piece of yellow paper sticking out of his jacket pocket.

  “I don’t care about the witnesses. I’ll shoot you right here on the street. That’s the difference between you and me. I’ll do it.”

  “You’re crazy.”

  Kenneth shook his head back and forth as if to say, “Maybe.”

  “You will stay with us and you will keep Matt on the straight and narrow until this is over.”

  Donne said, “Matt is your son and you’re going to force him to lose everything.”

  Kenneth grinned. “But now he has his family back.”

  THEY MOVED away from the curb, and moved close to the apartment building wall. The heat pulsated from the bricks—which had been holding it all day like a pizza oven. Sweat started to soak Donne’s hair. It was only April.

  Kenneth leaned in. “Don’t you see? This is about putting the past right and getting my family back together. The people I lost when I took the fall for Cole.”

  Donne flared his nostrils. “And you dragged me along. Almost got me killed.”

  Kenneth shook his head. “That’s Matt’s fault. He could have stayed quiet, never told you about me.”

  “And then I’d be dead in prison.”

  Kenneth laughed. “And, judging by your demeanor, happy about it.”

  “Shut up,” Donne said. “This is insane. It always has been insane. You can’t rob a federal building. Not one like this.”

  “I have a plan.”

  “I’m not a criminal. Your son is not a criminal.”

  “How many people have you killed, Jackson?”

  Kenneth went straight to the dagger. Years ago, a question like that would have sent Donne spiraling. He would have lost days in the bar, drowning in beer. All the blood on his hands that took hours to scrub clean from his skin. The bruises. The powder burns. All those reminders that he was a murderer.

  This was who he was.

  “Doesn’t matter.”

  “It doesn’t?” Kenneth looked out at the traffic, then back to Donne. “You’re telling me all those bodies you piled up don’t matter? That it’s not worse to kill tens of people over stealing money from the government? After all they’ve taken from us? From you? Years of our lives behind bars. Millions in taxes. Our rights. The government closes its fist around us every single day, and you’re telling me taking a little from them is worse than what you do? Think about it, Jackson. How many have you killed?”

  Donne chewed the inside of his lip. “I’m out of here.”

  “Then I’ll call the police.”

  “And say what? And say what? That you’re going to heist millions from a government facility? Good. That will take care of everything.”

  “No, you idiot.”

  Donne shook his head and started to walk away. Back toward the train station. Back to figure out what he was going to do next with his life.

  “All I need to do is leave an anonymous tip with the NYPD.”

  Donne froze.

  “Or maybe Elliot can do it, though I think he’d rather get his own revenge. But if you run?”

  Donne turned back around to see Kenneth standing there, hands spread as if to say, “What do you got?”

  “Think about it, Jackson. I leave one anonymous tip that I know who killed Bryan Hackett, or that Mosby. Any of your targets. Cops are good at their jobs. I say your name and I’m sure someone will recognize it. I’ll put you on their radar again. Which has to be the last thing you want.”

  Donne exhaled. A bus leaned on its horn, piercing his eardrums. A group of drunks stumbled out of the bar on the corner laughing and shouting. Monday night drinking—a young person’s game.

  “You don’t want to run again, not from the police.”

  “Like I won’t have to run after executing your plan. From people more powerful than the police.”

  Kenneth shook his head. “Think about it. Right now, what do you have? A credit card that’s barely holding on before they shut it down? After we finish the job, you’ll have millions. A lot easier to hide when you have money. New name. New life. Last time you told me you tried Vermont because of the beer. What’s next? Colorado? They have some good stuff I hear. But you walk away right now? With nothin
g? My tip will be fucking specific. They will find you.”

  “I already put myself in jail. I can do it again.”

  Kenneth nodded. “You can. Sure. But last time you had me, right? Do you remember the six months before I came along? Watching your back every day? Do you think your arm healed as best it could? Does your brain work as well after those concussions? If they knew what happened to you in prison, those guys suing the NFL would have a field day on the penitentiary system.”

  A chill ran through Donne’s stomach. New York prison would be worse. He didn’t know anyone, and he wasn’t about to play crazy to get protection. It wasn’t in him. Prison wasn’t fun, it was penance. And now that he was free again, he realized that Maybe he’d repaid his sins.

  Before he added more to the list, anyway.

  Donne took a deep breath and then said, “What do you need from me?”

  “To help. Follow the plan, stay out of my way.”

  “I want to know why Elliot wants me dead.”

  Kenneth nodded. “We have thirty-six hours before go time. We might be able to get some answers before then.”

  “Leave Matt out of this. I don’t want him to become like me.”

  “You’re not going to say a word to him. Nothing. This will make him whole. This will be my legacy. He’ll finally be my son.”

  “Jesus. How did I not realize you were this crazy in prison?”

  “Everyone in prison is crazy. Right on down to Fred Aguilera, our warden friend. No one ever notices.” Kenneth went toward the front door. “Let’s go upstairs. You can meet the whole family at once. And then we get to work.”

  Donne hesitated. He could run. He could stay ahead of the cops long enough to get back on his feet. Maybe Colorado would be nice.

  But Matt Herrick was upstairs, holding on to life. Donne had thrown his away. He couldn’t let that happen again.

  And if Donne left, he would leave Herrick all alone.

  It was time to pay Kenneth back for all the prison help. But maybe not the way Kenneth wanted.

  He followed Kenneth into the apartment building.

  HERRICK LOOKED around his apartment. The only thing missing was his basketball team. If they had been there, every important person in his life would be cramming their way in. As it was, with Donne, Kenneth, Sarah and Tammy here, it felt crowded.